Non-Jews are for practice
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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