READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Found your dick twin last night
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
