is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Ladies don't puke and tell
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
Randomize
