he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
