Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Randomize
