Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize
