She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
Randomize
