i jhust puked up my retainher.
u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
