the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
