Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Randomize
