Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
