She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
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