You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize