In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Randomize