I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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