Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Randomize