now i know why i became what i already was.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
