But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Randomize
