can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize