he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize