I am in a vortex of obligation.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
