Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
