I don't usually arrange sex via text message
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
