Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Nicole vs. Life
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize