Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
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