Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
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