That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
