That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
Randomize
