Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
kristin has been a bad kristin
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
Randomize