Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I want to fling myself into the sun
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Randomize
