What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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