i don't plan on having that self control this summer
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Randomize
