Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
