I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
Randomize
