In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
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