Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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