Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
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