idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Its about making memories worth repressing
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Randomize
