allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
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