Your dad touched me again.
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
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