They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
apparently the secret to your success is patron
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Randomize
