One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
