Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
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