And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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