Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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