Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize
