he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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