the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
I am mentally ready for anal.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
