I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Randomize