The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Randomize
